ghostytrainer: (you are talking to the pranking MASTER.)
John Egbert ([personal profile] ghostytrainer) wrote2011-01-16 12:07 pm
Entry tags:

voice mail

Oh hey, what's up?

[There's a pause, perhaps you should tell him why you called. At least until he interrupts...]

Hey, that's cool, but guess what?!

[Another short pause, perhaps you should guess what is so important that John felt the need to interrupt your surely riveting story.]

I am not actually here right now! So leave me a message and I will get back to you as soon as I can!

[You cannot hope to beat John Egbert in a prank-off. He is simply the best there is.]

Hehehehe...you totally fell for it, didn't you?

[Beep!]

((Please make note of the date and format of your message in the subject when tagging. ♥))
plushaeusrumpified: (My heart is paralyzed)

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-23 05:13 am (UTC)(link)
I meant your tongue, dumbass! But if you want me to cut your ass off then I fuckin' can. You ever seen that episode of Spongebob with the iron butt? That'll be you when I'm done. Good luck getting anybody to touch that.
tentacletrainer: (;))

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-02-23 05:31 am (UTC)(link)
[[Unfortunately for you Bro, your bout of threatening is about to be cut short. Rose had walked in at that, and had sat back and listened for just a little bit, and was now making her appearance by hanging on John's shoulder a little. Taking the gear from John, she switches the feed to video so she can offer Bro a smile.]]

Daddy dearest, there are two problems with what you are suggesting. One, it can't be making out if tongue is not involved, and I assure you my tongue is a very active participant even if his is not. And two, his butt is my favorite part of him. I'm sorry, but if you remove that we will have to have a serious discussion. I'm afraid this conversation however will have to come to an end, as John's lips are about to be otherwise occupied.

[[With a wink shuts it off.]]
plushaeusrumpified: (are the worst of all)

Action;

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-23 05:40 am (UTC)(link)
[It's quite possible that he sputters and yells for Rose to turn the thing back on for at least a full minute before he realizes that it's futile and that she most definitely is not going to do anything of the sort.

It takes even longer for him to realize and remember that they're now in the same city and that he can actually DO SOMETHING about it instead of just sitting there angry and indignant. He can be proactive. So that's why he is! He is marching his goddamn way to their hotel room.

And pounding the hell out of it.

You're lucky that he didn't just fucking kick it down, because he thought about it. He just doesn't want to walk in on them making out.

so.

WHAM WHAM WHAM MOTHERFUCKERS.]
tentacletrainer: (I'll admit it. That was clever.)

Action;

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-02-23 05:46 am (UTC)(link)
[[Rose simply gets up as the door is pounded on.]] John, he and I need to have a talk anyway. Don't worry, alright?

[[And that's all she's got to say on the matter before cracking the door open, waiting to make sure he won't go to hit the door and accidentally hit her instead or something before opening it more than just a crack.]]

Hello, dad.
plushaeusrumpified: (he's always with you)

Re: Action;

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-23 05:51 am (UTC)(link)
Don't 'hello dad' me like that.

[If he had accidentally hit her or anything, man he would have felt so bad. It's a good thing that didn't happen.

He stares at her with a flat expression.]


You better be wearing clothes.
tentacletrainer: (Are you proud of yourself?)

Action;

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-02-23 05:57 am (UTC)(link)
Okay honestly dad making out doesn't involve stripping. Please, please give me a little more credit. And don't try and tell me it's John you're judging because apparently you believe he is so tame he doesn't even know how to properly swap spit.
plushaeusrumpified: (I wanna live a thousand lives with you)

Action;

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-23 06:03 am (UTC)(link)
[Eurgh the whole 'dad' thing in general is making him uncomfortable when he's just so busy trying to be- well. A dad. It's like it's just overwhelmingly dad-ish and he can only be so much of a dad before it starts getting scary. Ugh.]

I'm givin you plenty of credit, but that look you had on your face suggested waaay more than making out! And I'm sure he knows how to swap spit, I was just trying to be insulting because I was- am pissy. You shouldn't even be making out with tongue at all!
tentacletrainer: (...well then.)

Action; Casually deletes last tag for bad math

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-02-23 06:14 am (UTC)(link)
[[Carefully - that's the keyword here - she crosses her arms, mindful of her bandaged one, and sighs.]]

I'm fifteen. If fifteen isn't old enough for making out, what age is? I mean honestly, this is about when teenagers start becoming more curious in the romantic aspects of relationships, so it's a very healthy exploration isn't it? And we've already talked about things going 'too fast' if we start making out. He knows there are boundaries that I maintain, and he completely respects them.

Plus, we're not married, so it's not like he'd cross them.

[[Don't be scared, Bro. She doesn't seem upset at least? She is very patient. u u]]
plushaeusrumpified: (I'll take the high road like I should)

ages in homestuck are a bitch

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-23 06:24 am (UTC)(link)
[Ugh he hates this conversation. So much. Because somewhere in the back of his mind he knows he's being ridiculous, but he can't stop...

Because Rose is his baby 8(

His baby girl who he never really got to know. And now he's trying to make up for it, and maybe he's going about it all wrong. He just doesn't know how else to do it. And he just wants to protect her! Make up for all those times he wasn't ever there and stuff.

So why does it feel like he keeps making mistakes?]


Yeah, but... just. Why can't you just kiss normally? Y'know, little smooches without the tongue. Why's it gotta be all French up in there with you? That's way too much like foreplay. People get carried away all the time. You two could do that! That ain't me not giving you guys credit, it's just, like... A fact of puberty!
tentacletrainer: (That's very kind of you to say.)

they really are. even with route here to make it easy they're hard.

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-02-23 06:34 am (UTC)(link)
[[See and this is why she's patient. And as he talks, she can't help but smile a little.]]

It's not like we make out all the time. A large majority of our kisses are just little smooches without tongue, I promise.
plushaeusrumpified: (pic#5120881)

sobs one day maybe it will be easy

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-23 06:44 am (UTC)(link)
I...

[He sighs, in what sounds like defeat. He's tired of having this conversation, because he knows that he can't actually stop them. That's the frustrating part. It's not like he wasn't doing worse at her age. But... he doesn't want to admit that. Or admit that he has an obvious double standard.

Bro's life is suffering.]


Fine. Whatever. It's obvious that you have no reason or inclination to listen to a damn thing I say, so go ahead. Kiss the fuck away.

[He's just gonna turn to leave now, because he's getting frustrated for a lot of different reasons, and it's better that if he doesn't stay.]
tentacletrainer: (Daughterly Hug.)

as long as hussie writes the comic, never.

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-02-23 06:50 am (UTC)(link)
[[Frowning, Rose watches him a moment. But nope, not getting off that easily. He may be leaving, but she's following, shutting the door behind her as she goes.

Bro, you're getting a tentative hug from behind. Tentative because she doesn't know how he feels about hugs, but if it's anything like Dave he's probably not used to them.]]


I never said I won't listen.
plushaeusrumpified: (fried getting suntan)

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-23 07:09 am (UTC)(link)
[She's right when she assumes that he isn't used to hugs. The amount of hugs he gives a year can probably be counted on one hand, if he's perfectly honest. So when he feels her arms wrap around him, he can't help but tense up. He doesn't know what to think or how to act about it, so he just stands there.

He relaxes slightly when she says that, but it just makes him even more unsure what to say.]


That isn't the impression I've gotten so far, Rose. The impression I've gotten so far is that I'm just a joke for you to laugh at whenever I try and tell you what to do, or involve myself in anything.
tentacletrainer: (It's a test of endurance.)

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-02-23 07:21 am (UTC)(link)
[[And now she's not really sure what to say to that. She's not...really surprised. She knows her nature of playing or teasing isn't always taken that way. Or even the way she handles situations in a sarcastic or sometimes passive aggressive or cynical way. Hell, even when she tries to lighten the mood, she's pretty sure it comes off wrong.

Man what are people skills.]]


I've...never meant for it to come off that way.
plushaeusrumpified: (that's cool)

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-23 07:40 am (UTC)(link)
[It isn't really Rose's fault. It's more like Bro is just being a big, dumb, oversensitive baby about this. He shouldn't take her so seriously, but... it's impossible, when every time he shows any inkling of fatherly behavior, he gets trolled. It just makes him feel like he's stupid for even trying. With that on top of the feelings he already has about trying to be a father, it's just... hard not to be upset right now- hard not to feel like his attempts are doing nothing more than making him the butt of every goddamn joke.

When she says that, it's hard to believe it, if only because he's just so upset right now. But he takes a deep breath, trying to calm down.]


Put yourself in my place and tell me how else I'm supposed to take it.

[His voice is quiet, but he's trying not to sound as upset as he feels. For the most part, he's succeeding.]

I'm not used to this, Rose. I don't know what the fuck I'm doin'. But you're not cutting me any slack. Neither of you are. Like you both expect me to do it right when I'm trying as hard as I fuckin' can!

[No, there's a quiver to it now that he can't fucking shake, and it just hurts him right in his fucking pride, because god damn it he shouldn't be getting this emotional over it. Fuck him. Fuck this all. But he can't move, because her arms are still around him, and tugging out of her grip would just hurt even more, because on some level he doesn't want her to let go.]

Sorry, I just... I dunno. Whatever. It's fine. I'm fine, you should just go back to John.
tentacletrainer: (It was an utter failure.)

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-02-23 07:53 am (UTC)(link)
That's not what I'm expecting at all, and I am not just leaving this to fester. [[She almost expects him to pull away, so she tightens her grip. Because...honestly it wouldn't just hurt him.]]

It would be completely unrealistic to expect you to get it right immediately, and I would never do that, but...you're not the only one getting used to this. I've never had a father. Nor have I really had...such a strong parental figure.

[[Sure she's had mom, but between the drinking and their passive aggressive games which were probably more pa on her part and less on her mom's part, it was never really...a 'don't you do this, your mother said so' situation. Sure she listened when her mother was serious but...]]

And well...I think we need to sit down and talk for a while. Just you and me. Because obviously we both need to figure each other out...because I promise it was never my intention to make you feel like a fool for trying to be a father.
plushaeusrumpified: (and ways to say you died)

[personal profile] plushaeusrumpified 2013-02-26 11:11 pm (UTC)(link)
[Any part of him that did want to pull away is kinda pushed aside when she tightens her grip. That just shows that she doesn't actually want him to leave, and it makes him want to stay more. But then she mentions talking about it, and... God, that's scary. What's there to even say? Talking involves feelings, and he's already let out a lot of feelings now. Ones that he would usually hide, if it wasn't for the fact he'd gotten so worked up. But he knows what she's saying is true- they do need to talk. Because if this festers, it's only going to lead to bitter feelings. For her sake, he's decided he needs to give John a chance. But today was a major setback, and if this shit isn't resolved, then he isn't sure if he'll be able to get over it. So after a few moments of silence, he nods slowly.]

You... wanna go get somethin' to eat, then?