ghostytrainer: (pester pester!)
John Egbert ([personal profile] ghostytrainer) wrote2013-06-25 11:50 pm

prank #44 | text

[Hello Pokémon World. It's almost 3 in the morning and who all is still awake at this hour? Aside from John, who hasn't slept (save for occasionally nodding off for a few hours here and there) in nearly five days now. But unlike the past three nights, apparently tonight he's feeling kind of chatty.]

[Too bad he doesn't really have anything worthwhile to say...]


ok so i know there's a shit ton of stuff here that doesn't make a lot of sense.
you know like... how everything lays eggs, even the mammals?
and ghosts? ill nrver get that one at all, even if i pride myself as somethign of an ectobreeder.
and don't even get me started on fly just...
that's dumb.
SO DUMB.
but w/e, do you ever just like...sit there adn really think about some of this stuff?

like zubat.

what is even the deal with those fuckers?
they don't have any eyes. but for SOMW REASON they learn mean look.
how can they give ANYTHING a LOOK, MEAN OR OTHERWISE????
it's like how wooper can learn ice punch.
WIHT WHAT ARMS, I ASK YOU??? i am like 1000% sure you need arsm in order to punch someting.

maybe even over 9000% sure of that.
it is not possible to be more postibve of anything than i am right now about needing arms for punching.

no ok i lied we're gointo talk about the flying thing.
like how does that even work you get the hm and you use it on your bird or dragon or whatever is it just like
OH SHIT SON.
IT'S THAT THING I ALREADY KNWE HOW TO DO.
THE THING I DO BASICALLY EVERY DAY BECAUSE I'M A BIRD AND THAT'S HOW I GET AROUND.
BUT NOW I CAN *CARRY YOU*. YOU AND *ALL OF YOUR CRAP*.
what an astounding revelation your pokemon must be having.
okay, all you lucky ducks out there who can read your pokemon's minds or whatever i gotta know.
what's going through your bird/dragon/giant automaton ghost's mind when you crack the fly hm over their heads.
someone get back tome on that.

goddamn i wish i was a poketelepath.
like that would just be the coolest fucking thing. be able to talk to them in your mind and stuff.
crzy mind conversations all day, everyday. with ALL of your pokermon, not just the psychic types.
so.
cool.
only vaguely related, but i miss being able to fly on my own.
i liked it better when i didn't knoe i had powers so i had no idea what i was missing out on. :(
now it's just like "man, john, remember when you had super strength and could do the windy thing and it was basically awesoem? NOT ANYMORE, BUDDY, SORRY."
oh well, i guess.
that's the way the cookie crumbles!

speaking of cookirs, i wonder if it's possible to make literal pancakes.
like using cake batter insread of pancake batter.
but making it ina frying pan on the stove instead of in the oven.
holy shit.
i think i know what i'm goign to do once i'm done watching ghost eraser 3.
dave. dave if you're reading this you should totally come over to my room and help.
we'll do it for scinese.
wait no.

fuck science.
i forgot that science blows and is basically completyl inferior to magic in every way.
let's make kitchen magic, dude. it'll be great.
jade, you can come too even thouhg you think sciende is cool. i won't hold it against you.
even if you're still totally WRONG about that particular issue.

oh but rewind for a sec, let's talk about ghost eraser.
these are actually pretty okay as far as johto moives go. not as good as ghostbusters, sure, but not terirble either.
it's much less of a dissapontment than con dragonair, which is not even close to ebing the same thing as con air which is BASICALLY THE BEST MOVIE EVER, just saying.
i mean they fight a haunted janitor in the first one, pretty damn sweet. in ghost eraser, i mean. not con dragonair, we're not talking about that disappointment anymore.
nope nope.
but it's pretty much impoddible to be a better ghost hunter mobie than ghostbusters.
i m p o s s i b l e





holy shit when did it get to be 3am?
doing the time warp over here or something because i swaer it wasn't that late last i looked at the clock.
ahahahahahahahahahaha.
fuck.
healium: (serious faced)

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[personal profile] healium 2013-07-03 03:09 am (UTC)(link)
Yes, so that means you should get back in bed.

John Egbert I will get up
and drag your sorry butt back to bed
and have Melody sing you to sleep
if you aren't in bed in ten minutes.


[Oh, why didn't she think of this for her own sleep problems? She wouldn't be having this conversation, because she'd be in dreamland sob]

That, or I will get up and bake cake.
And you will eat it.
tentacletrainer: (Hmph)

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-07-03 03:11 am (UTC)(link)
...I'm not mad I'm just...frustrated. [[There's a sigh on her end.]] Because I'm worried about you too. And you aren't taking care of yourself but you're not listening to me so I don't know what to do about that. I'm serious when I ask you if you've looked in a mirror. Have you? If not, go do that. Tell me you're okay.

And nothing is going to happen to us. Why would you think something would?

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[personal profile] papshooshing 2013-07-03 03:22 am (UTC)(link)
Mostly it was spent making fun of religions revolving around the ridiculous notion of honking horns and clown make up.

...And listening to what his tone deaf spongeclots derive as music.
tentacletrainer: (Hmph)

[personal profile] tentacletrainer 2013-07-03 03:41 am (UTC)(link)
[[Rose is completely silent for a little while after he's done talking.]]

I would never reconsider our relationship.

[[That's all she's got to say on that.]]

I hadn't meant that in past tense, John. I was simply trying to reassure you that nothing was in question between the two of us, because you are a wonderful fiance and I love you very much. As for ignoring you...I was just thinking very hard on things, that's all.
Edited 2013-07-03 03:43 (UTC)

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[personal profile] papshooshing 2013-07-03 03:49 am (UTC)(link)
Dave used the phrase in passing and thus explained it because like I fucking know what he had meant by it.

...And don't you ever tell him what I am about to relay to you, Egbert. I swear, if I find out otherwise, you will suffer for the duration of our travel time together. I know where you sleep.

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[personal profile] papshooshing 2013-07-03 03:59 am (UTC)(link)
I might actually tap my foot or something to his lyric-less beats.

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[personal profile] papshooshing 2013-07-03 04:21 am (UTC)(link)
John, don't make me regret divulging such lucrative information to you.
islandshore: (amused)

[personal profile] islandshore 2013-07-03 07:36 am (UTC)(link)
You know, now I want to catch one just to see how it works. This calls for extensive research.

[Only not. But seriously, he is curious now.]

And there's no real reason. I just need to get off my butt and do something productive. It feels like I've just been wasting time.
timelymaid: art by <user name=strovi site=tumblr.com> (+ creeping.)

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[personal profile] timelymaid 2013-07-03 04:46 pm (UTC)(link)
are you upset about the heir of breath crap
is that why youre awake at stupid o clock in the morning
i think thats the correct term
also yes
should we host our own spelling bee
i can enlist kanaya to make a crown with happy bees even

and it is completely okay :)
we are friends and friends are allowed to do stuff like forget one another sometimes
also its wednesday
youre not proving your not needing sleep case btw

im sorry for scaring you!!
also i wouldnt blow it up!
i like it here
and you know its pretty cheerful
and im pretty sure i dont have the resources to blow shit up anyway so

(im kidding)
(that was a joke)
healium: (not sure if want)

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[personal profile] healium 2013-07-03 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
You're being stubborn,
that's why I seem like no fun.


[Except she does feel like she's no fun; maybe she'll take this time to brainstorm pranks for a change. It's been too long since she's done any, after all, and she clearly can't invoke fake-fear about cakes anymore.]
timelymaid: art by <user name=dodostad site=tumblr.com> (+ genuine smile. close.)

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[personal profile] timelymaid 2013-07-03 10:04 pm (UTC)(link)
i am sure the only reason you didnt focus on that
was because it wasnt the proper time
trust me
if you had then youd probably be a doomed john
and everyone knows you are the superior john of johns
and ive met a lot of johns so you should take my word for it!!

i would say it happened today!!!
(yeah but no one else had as many memories as you silly!
they just had minor memory updates
you were sort of the furthest behind
and then you just had to go leapfrog ahead of everyone :T
at least dave is representing the good name of time players everywhere by being properly ahead of stuff)

wait since when did the dark side have cookies
no one told me about this
why wasnt i told about this
maybe i should join team murder everyone after all!!!

would you really make me actual cookies though
timelymaid: art by <user name=strovi site=tumblr.com> (+ loves her fedora.)

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[personal profile] timelymaid 2013-07-03 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)
haha carp
now youre making unintentional fish puns you realize
but yeah i can see how it might get boring
being on a ship with the same people i mean
the meteor was sort of dull
and frustrating
but i was also still dead so you cant really take my word for it

also i thought wed collectively agreed that sgrub/burb doesnt make sense
in our previous conversations
(i mean it makes sense but we dont know enough
or those of us who do cant explain it because reasons)

i guess technically i have already eaten dark side bad cookies
lets not repeat that

okay i am holding you to this
as soon as i hit kanto you owe me cookies john egbert!!!

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