ghostytrainer | voice mail

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voice mail

Oh hey, what's up?

[There's a pause, perhaps you should tell him why you called. At least until he interrupts...]

Hey, that's cool, but guess what?!

[Another short pause, perhaps you should guess what is so important that John felt the need to interrupt your surely riveting story.]

I am not actually here right now! So leave me a message and I will get back to you as soon as I can!

[You cannot hope to beat John Egbert in a prank-off. He is simply the best there is.]

Hehehehe...you totally fell for it, didn't you?

[Beep!]

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1A. YES.
1B. FUCK YES.
2. HA HA HA!! I GOT YOU TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE TWO.
3. I WAS GOING TO SAY "MAJOR" IN IT'S PLACE, BULGESUCKER.
4. NO, BECAUSE I AM GOING TO REMOVE MINE TONIGHT.

1a. no.
1b. hell no.
2. fuck you.
3. but you didn't so i interpreted it how i wanted to!
4. your earrings or your brain?

1A. I SAID YES.
1B. THAT'S A FUCK YES.
2. THAT'S NOT MY JOB, BUT RATHER IT'S ROSE'S.
3. YOU KNEW WHAT I WAS IMPLYING, ASSWIPE. DON'T PRETEND OTHERWISE.
4. MY EARRINGS, DUH!

1a. and i said no.
1b. definitely a fuck no.
3. shhh let me have my dreams.
4. wait what? why did you even go through with it in the first place if you are just going to let them close up that doesn't make any sense.

OKAY I AM DINE WITH THIS NUMBERING BULLSHIT.
IT HAS GOTTEN PASSED THE AMUSING STAGE INTO THE TEDIOUS NOOKBITING ONE AND THAT MEANS IT'S OVER.
I WENT THROUGH WITH THE THING BECAUSE ROSE.
THAT SHOULD BE A SUFFICIENT ENOUGH REASON.
IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE AN ASS ABOUT THAT THEN YES, I WILL LET THEM CLOSE UP.

yesssss. i win!!
hehehehehehe.
my god though, come on man, i was just teasing you.
put yourself in my shoes, you can't honestly tell me if the situation were reversed that you wouldn't give me a hard time about it.
at least give it some time and see how you feel before you go pulling them out just because i am being a bro and doing what bros are supposed to do.
did you ask vanitas what he thinks?

...YEAH, YEAH. OKAY.
YOU HAVE ME THERE.
I'D DEFINITELY RAG ON YOU UNTIL YOU WERE SOBBING ON THE FLOOR, BEGGING FOR ME TO STOP.
VANITAS, THOUGH?
HE ISN'T APPALLED BY THE IDEA AND THINKS IT LOOKS GOOD.
WHAT HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND IS *WHY* EVEN AFTER I EXPLAINED IT.

that's what i thought!
it's probably because he doesn't know rose as well as we do.
perhaps one day he will understand.

SOMEHOW I'M NOT SURE HE EVER WILL.

why do you say that?

BECAUSE I AM PRETTY SURE THAT NOT EVEN *WE* FULLY GET HER.

well i didn't say he had to!
just at least as well as we do. which, you are right is probably not an absolute understanding.
but it's more fun that way. at least i think it is.

YOU *WOULD* THINK IT'S MORE FUN THAT WAY.

well yeah.
it's boring once you know everything there is to know about a person.
or anything, for that matter.
everything should always have some degree of mystery to it. something unknown that keeps your interest piqued and allows for happy little surprises every so often.

JOHN.
MAYBE YOU FORGET THIS, BUT I AM SORT OF A SUCKER FOR PREDICTABILITY.
SURPRISES AND KARKAT THROWN INTO THE BATTER OF LIFE DO NOT TEND TO BLEND WELL ENOUGH TO TASTE RIGHT AFTER THE HEAT IS ON.

i'm not sure if i should be touched or laugh at the fact that you seem to have gone out of your way to make a baking metaphor for me.
you really should try and loosen up some though, dude. sometimes surprises are a good thing!

IN OUR LIVES, JOHN, CAN YOU NAME AT LEAST THREE INSTANCES OF GOOD SURPRISES?
I CERTAINLY CAN'T.

coming here was a good surprise.
waking up every day and STILL being here is a whole string of good little surprises.

beyond that, there are a whole bunch of little mundane surprises that i personally think were good.
but they don't really apply to anybody beyond myself so they don't really ocunt for "our lives."

I MEANT IN THE GAME, RETARD.

there's more to our lives than the game though.
and you can't honestly tell me that before shit went to hell, there weren't some things that you didn't enjoy about sburb.
you guys even got to play through the whole thing.
it's just not possible that you were miserable the entire time playing a game like that with all your friends.

HOW MUCH DO YOU WANT TO BET ON THAT, EGBERT?

deny it all you want, karkat.
deep down, i think even you know there were a few things you enjoyed.
in fact, you totally just thought of one right now! didn't you mr. ruthless leader? :P

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