John Egbert (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ghostytrainer) wrote2011-08-27 11:23 pm
ghostytrainer) wrote2011-08-27 11:23 pm
Entry tags:
prank #23 | accidental audio [BACKDATED TO THE NIGHT OF 8/26]
[Do you know the dangerous thing about sticking your pokegear in your back pocket is? Give you a hint, it involves sitting down.]
[If you guessed accidental butt-dials, you would be one hundred percent correct! And that is exactly what's happening right now as the network is graced with the sound of a boy yelping in pain.]
--eoowch!
As I told you, John. If you would hold still and relax, this would only cause minimal pain. Please try and keep that in mind.
I'm trying to, Rose! But that's a lot easier said than--ow--done. Especially since you seem to be a lot better at getting it in than getting it out.
Again. If you would hold still, pulling it out would not be such a challenge.
[There's a sound of somebody (presumably John) taking a deep breath followed by the sound of a body squirming against a sleeping bag.]
Okay, I'm still now. Just...hurry up and pull it out!
Do you really want me to "hurry"? One would think that would simply cause greater pain. But if that's really what you are requesting me to do.
Yes, please just do it quickly. This really kind of hurts and I can't stand how it feels. God, why did we think this was a good idea?
If I remember correctly, you are the one who suggested it in the first place. Something about how fun it would be. Though I do admit, I found it quite enjoyable at first.
Oh yes, it was a lot of fun until the part with the intense pain. That's about when it stopped being fun. And I'm not feeling any pulling...I would really appreciate it if that were a thing you were doing right now. Please.
Now, whose fault was that? If you had listened to my instructions, that would not have happened. I say everything with a reason. Reason being for you to listen. And I apologize. I will commence immediately.
Hey, I do too listen! Every word that falls fr-- FFFFFUCK OW! Oh my god, ow!
[A tiny chuckle.] It's out now.
Still hurts though.
Yes, well, that is an unfortunate side-effect. It will subside soon, I assure you. No offense meant by this, but I do hope you do not require a kiss to make it better.
But Rooooose. [A very fake-sounding whine. Presumably there's a pout to go along with this as well but oh the joys of audio posts.] you have maaagic kisses and I just won't feel better without one~
Perhaps after we've exhausted ourselves and retreated to bed. For now, however, there is a matter yet still to attend to.
Okay, I think I can live with that.
That is a relief to know. Now, take a few deep breaths, relax, and then we will proceed with round two once you feel you are adequately prepared.
[John takes a deep breath and the transmission abruptly cuts off.]
((ooc: IN CASE YOU COULDN'T GUESS...no, there is nothing naughty going on. John just has a couple of big splinters in his hand. And splinters hurt, man. ;n;))
[If you guessed accidental butt-dials, you would be one hundred percent correct! And that is exactly what's happening right now as the network is graced with the sound of a boy yelping in pain.]
--eoowch!
As I told you, John. If you would hold still and relax, this would only cause minimal pain. Please try and keep that in mind.
I'm trying to, Rose! But that's a lot easier said than--ow--done. Especially since you seem to be a lot better at getting it in than getting it out.
Again. If you would hold still, pulling it out would not be such a challenge.
[There's a sound of somebody (presumably John) taking a deep breath followed by the sound of a body squirming against a sleeping bag.]
Okay, I'm still now. Just...hurry up and pull it out!
Do you really want me to "hurry"? One would think that would simply cause greater pain. But if that's really what you are requesting me to do.
Yes, please just do it quickly. This really kind of hurts and I can't stand how it feels. God, why did we think this was a good idea?
If I remember correctly, you are the one who suggested it in the first place. Something about how fun it would be. Though I do admit, I found it quite enjoyable at first.
Oh yes, it was a lot of fun until the part with the intense pain. That's about when it stopped being fun. And I'm not feeling any pulling...I would really appreciate it if that were a thing you were doing right now. Please.
Now, whose fault was that? If you had listened to my instructions, that would not have happened. I say everything with a reason. Reason being for you to listen. And I apologize. I will commence immediately.
Hey, I do too listen! Every word that falls fr-- FFFFFUCK OW! Oh my god, ow!
[A tiny chuckle.] It's out now.
Still hurts though.
Yes, well, that is an unfortunate side-effect. It will subside soon, I assure you. No offense meant by this, but I do hope you do not require a kiss to make it better.
But Rooooose. [A very fake-sounding whine. Presumably there's a pout to go along with this as well but oh the joys of audio posts.] you have maaagic kisses and I just won't feel better without one~
Perhaps after we've exhausted ourselves and retreated to bed. For now, however, there is a matter yet still to attend to.
Okay, I think I can live with that.
That is a relief to know. Now, take a few deep breaths, relax, and then we will proceed with round two once you feel you are adequately prepared.
[John takes a deep breath and the transmission abruptly cuts off.]
((ooc: IN CASE YOU COULDN'T GUESS...no, there is nothing naughty going on. John just has a couple of big splinters in his hand. And splinters hurt, man. ;n;))
text; because Dave's pokerface is destroyed right now
take it slow and dont do it dry
you can seriously damage a guy like that lalonde
or so i hear
text; you're welcome, dave.
[Yeah, he has no idea how bad that sounded since he has no idea how long it was recording. Also he has the correct context.]
text; and it's not getting better
splinters
you havent listened to that post yet have you
text; like he expected anything else from john
text; that's true.
yes you should
and bear that question in mind while youre doing it
text;
text;
have to say i didnt expect it to pan out quite like that
but i shouldve known
a strider always pitches
pass my admiration and pride along to my sister for me
Re: text;
[The concept of pegging is a foreign concept to John. He was not aware that that was a thing that could happen.]
text;
john honey no
i cant have this conversation with you
but you should ask your girlfriend how her popping your cherry would work
and keep a video feed running for me when you do
text;
text;
fine
youll find out the hard way eventually
like i said striders always pitch
text;
text;
just saying